Jane
What to say about Jane
An old friend
Yes.
History
Jane and I have history
A new friend said
Yes.
Yes
Jane and I have tales to tell
of each other and to each other
Tales going way back
Past.
A past
With secrets Jane and I share
Which we can reveal
Or not.
Not
Was the answer before
What difference does that make
Now?
Jane
Of a thousand things said
And only a few
Withheld.
Secrets
Make us sick
Or keep a friendship
Whole?
Or not
Is our present
Based on that secret
Less?
Then
It seemed so not to matter
A favor to not share
Shame.
Now
Jane curls in upon herself
Like a tree around an ax strike
Scared.
Then
Was it mine to keep inside
Or hers she kept from me
Ours?
It
Sits between us now
Is it too late to excise
This wound?
If
I were to speak of it now
Could she even admit
It?
And
Would the wound thus opened
Be larger
Worse?
Festering
An opening coming
Way too late for us
For Jane.
(c) J. Binford-Bell
What to say about Jane
An old friend
Yes.
History
Jane and I have history
A new friend said
Yes.
Yes
Jane and I have tales to tell
of each other and to each other
Tales going way back
Past.
A past
With secrets Jane and I share
Which we can reveal
Or not.
Not
Was the answer before
What difference does that make
Now?
Jane
Of a thousand things said
And only a few
Withheld.
Secrets
Make us sick
Or keep a friendship
Whole?
Or not
Is our present
Based on that secret
Less?
Then
It seemed so not to matter
A favor to not share
Shame.
Now
Jane curls in upon herself
Like a tree around an ax strike
Scared.
Then
Was it mine to keep inside
Or hers she kept from me
Ours?
It
Sits between us now
Is it too late to excise
This wound?
If
I were to speak of it now
Could she even admit
It?
And
Would the wound thus opened
Be larger
Worse?
Festering
An opening coming
Way too late for us
For Jane.
(c) J. Binford-Bell
This is powerfully evocative of non-shared agonies. Would if help if you tried catharsis? I'm not sure it would...this wound is so deep and so old now. Time, the great healer, seems not to apply here. You have found your way; she must find hers.
ReplyDeleteWe are as sick as the secrets we keep. And the curling in on herself is so like what my mother did. She lived with the memory of incest all her life and only toward the end of it shared that memory with my sister and me.
ReplyDeleteI like to think that did set her free from this life and give her a chance to make her next life different. I am a real believer in karma.