Saturday, July 30, 2011




In the hours between dusk and dawn
I have been taking a long dark look
In the far reaches of my soul
Seeking bright memories among the pain
Looking for hope.

I have been seeking a positive note
Among the funeral dirges
But my vision blurs
With the tears of loss
Mourning the moments.

So very fleeting
Our time together
In the quantum concept of time
Your living like a shooting star
Lighting my life
But briefly.

And now I am left
With all these dark spaces
Filled with endless tears
Next life
You cry for me.

Jacqui Binford-Bell
August 2010

Note: Last August my ex-husband of nine years, dear friend of 23, died. He was reluctantly my soul mate and his loss hit me harder than I expected because we had been divorced for 13 years while remaining friends. I entered into what I call my "dark work" in painting and wrote numerous poems as an internal process to mourn his loss. Not all of them, paintings and poems, have seen the light of day. But as I near the year anniversary I am able to look back at this period and see its complexity, and the depth in fostered in my art and poetry.


  1. Oh my dear Jacqui I feel your pain. Is it a year? How hard it is when the pain doesn't ease as quickly as one expects. Twenty three years is a long time and even separation from each other could not break the ties you had.

    As I said around this time last year, cherish and hold onto all the memories. Some are not as happy as others but they are all part of what bonded you.

    Great poem - understandably sad and brutally honest.

  2. Losing another is heartwrenching, being the one left wrangling those feelings, painful! :(
    enjoy the potluck!

  3. There is such a profound depth to both the words and art - fantastic delight to feast upon

  4. that you have been able to express yourself with your outlets is a very positive thing. I am so sorry for your loss. may your heart heal soon.

  5. "Next life, you cry for me."
    A very powerful line. Sympathies for your loss, but work well done.

  6. Oh, I love the end to this one. You just made my day. Well done.

  7. This poem is absolutely brilliant. Aha!

  8. vivid imagery, well told story.

    thanks for being a supportive figure.


I appreciate all kind comments on my art and poetry.